[ he admits it, but it's difficult to put the rest of it into words. enta and kazuki had asked some questions, but they were also there when it happened, so toi didn't really have to get too into it-- and none of them are the type to really discuss their feelings in depth, so he was able to pass over talking about certain things in detail.
it's a little difficult to look at her, but he manages. ]
I thought I was ready for... whatever was going to happen, after leaving the house. And I wasn't.
[ meltryllis is used to the people she loves leaving her (or her leaving them), one way or another. she only wants that by leaving, it's to be happy or to become happier, not to want to die or cease to exist because the older brother who raised him was a shitty older brother.
she knows that's not the kind of thing to say here. she understands how much toi loves his brother even if she doesn't understand why. ]
He was your whole world for a while, wasn't he? He was your whole world even if he might have betrayed you.
You'd still want him around even if you wanted something else from him. Or even if you didn't.
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[ he admits it, but it's difficult to put the rest of it into words. enta and kazuki had asked some questions, but they were also there when it happened, so toi didn't really have to get too into it-- and none of them are the type to really discuss their feelings in depth, so he was able to pass over talking about certain things in detail.
it's a little difficult to look at her, but he manages. ]
I thought I was ready for... whatever was going to happen, after leaving the house. And I wasn't.
no subject
she knows that's not the kind of thing to say here. she understands how much toi loves his brother even if she doesn't understand why. ]
He was your whole world for a while, wasn't he? He was your whole world even if he might have betrayed you.
You'd still want him around even if you wanted something else from him. Or even if you didn't.
no subject
but there is a slow nod, and he doesn't respond right away, trying to articulate a way to agree that isn't just a one word answer. ]
... yeah.
[ first step failed. but he tries again. ]
I needed to... figure that out. Before I saw anyone.