bursts into tears

[oversea]

Comments

[oversea]

They just want me to convince you to start modeling for them.

[ which is why... elysium has moved away. he can't do the job if he's not here. ]

[transmit]

I'll get them to stop bothering you.

[oversea]

It's fine

It just shows how popular you are.

[transmit]

[ is he popular…


he sends thorns a product page for his photocards. they are sold out…

then an eb*y listing of one that is signed. it goes for as much as one (1) standard vitamix. ]

[oversea]

[ WHAT DA HAEL ]

What is this

[transmit]

An objective measure of your popularity

Look
Your autograph got bid on 43 times before someone won

[oversea]

Oh

Are they confusing me for someone else?

[transmit]

You think I'd mistake you?

[oversea]

[ CALLS HIM ]

[transmit]

Aren't you at work?
I'm at work

[ runs ]

[oversea]

Stop bidding on things
You know me

[transmit]

What if someone weird bought it…

[oversea]

No
No one else would buy it

[transmit]

Explain the other people bidding.

[ there are ten unique bidders. sir? and only one other person crazy enough to cross the $500 threshold with elysium… they are thornsluvr5000. ]

Unless you're about to come up with a conspiracy theory that it's the company driving up prices. They're not. I checked.

[oversea]

You checked?

I don't know. I guess this agency is a lot more popular than I thought it was.

[transmit]

[ changes topic ]

They actually asked me if I could convince you to do more for them, too. Like getting into acting and variety. I told them they were lucky enough getting you to model.

I was right, right? This is just a side gig for you.

[ NO SINGLES INFERNO FOR THORNS!!!!!!!!!!!! ]

[oversea]

[ imagine if thorns said he wants to become an influencer when he barely knows how to take a selfie. they're going to start running an instagram on his behalf because he is so bad at it. ]

What's variety

[transmit]

[ the way i have considered this as one of the plot points. pr manager ely. ]

Do you want to pretend to date other attractive people?
They're going to look like squids compared to me.

[oversea]

Even if I wanted to, I don't think I could be convincing.

[ thorns would either be seen as an asshole or someone who is dark and mysterious... ]

[transmit]

That doesn't matter. They're going to put you on something where there are ten people trying to win you over.

Are you actually interested?

[ snaps his phone in half



just kidding he just stares very intensely at his phone waiting for thorns to answer. work? what work. ]

[oversea]

[ fucking help ]

I have a boyfriend

And even if I didn't that sounds like a nightmare.

[transmit]

You do.
That's why no variety

[ i get so much mileage out of these icons ]

Did you want more work, though…? Are they not paying you enough?

[oversea]

The pay's fine
I need to save up more though and my paid internship ended this semester.

[ elysium can watch thorns type something out for what feels like a minute, but then the message that is actually sent does not match the time he was typing. ]

I guess I can look for another job.

[transmit]

Have you tried talking to Dr. Kal'tsit? She's always looking for help but doesn't keep an open listing. Supposedly, it filters out the more annoying applicants.

Whatever she'd offer you would be in the realm of what you're actually interested in, yeah?

[oversea]

[ thorns is still wondering how the hell elysium got close enough to her that he knew to go to her for help. ]

Thanks
I'll look into it.
Even if she doesn't she might know people who do, I guess