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[Anya is a straightforward person.
She thinks she understands things very clearly - and one of those things is that without a doubt, Karkat is one of her dearest friends in the entire universe. No matter what odd things Retrospec might've brought them, whether it be taking away her words or giving him horns, it didn't really matter because at the end of the day he was Karkat and she was Anya and everything would be okay as long as they were together.
She's explaining herself with the words she has in an interview - laughing at the idea of finding someone that she wants to date, and then moving on to the next question of who her ideal person is. Obviously it is someone who is kind, who is always doing their best, and because she is Anya and she likes attention, it is not the worst thing if it is someone who shows her special treatment -
And it clicks. Considerably too late, it clicks. It shows on her face as she's distracted by the idea that maybe the person she was looking for was always waiting for her - and the interviewer seems to take her distraction as a sign that she's tired and maybe they should wrap.
Anya steals away into the hallway once she's freed and calls him immediately - ]
Katya, where are you?
[ - she's certainly already grabbing her bag, her things, her feet carrying her out the door before she even thinks to wait for a proper location.]
She thinks she understands things very clearly - and one of those things is that without a doubt, Karkat is one of her dearest friends in the entire universe. No matter what odd things Retrospec might've brought them, whether it be taking away her words or giving him horns, it didn't really matter because at the end of the day he was Karkat and she was Anya and everything would be okay as long as they were together.
She's explaining herself with the words she has in an interview - laughing at the idea of finding someone that she wants to date, and then moving on to the next question of who her ideal person is. Obviously it is someone who is kind, who is always doing their best, and because she is Anya and she likes attention, it is not the worst thing if it is someone who shows her special treatment -
And it clicks. Considerably too late, it clicks. It shows on her face as she's distracted by the idea that maybe the person she was looking for was always waiting for her - and the interviewer seems to take her distraction as a sign that she's tired and maybe they should wrap.
Anya steals away into the hallway once she's freed and calls him immediately - ]
Katya, where are you?
[ - she's certainly already grabbing her bag, her things, her feet carrying her out the door before she even thinks to wait for a proper location.]
[ he's surprised when he gets the phone call. karkat was pretty sure she was supposed to be doing some sort of interview right now, and he didn't think it would be over this soon. she has good timing though; he just clocked out after his shift, so he's able to answer right away without earning death glares from his manager. ]
Leaving work. Why?
[ it's also a little strange that she called instead of texted if this was all she wanted to ask him. he wonders if something happened, something urgent. ]
Anya, do you need me to fuck up an interviewer?
[ DID THEY ASK SOMETHING BAD??? ]
Leaving work. Why?
[ it's also a little strange that she called instead of texted if this was all she wanted to ask him. he wonders if something happened, something urgent. ]
Anya, do you need me to fuck up an interviewer?
[ DID THEY ASK SOMETHING BAD??? ]
[ you don't have to be an expert detective to notice that hana doesn't really do breaks. and stephanie gets it, she does. sometimes you get so wrapped into your work that it's very easy to forget that there's a world outside of it. but steph also knows very well what living that way nonstop can do to a person.
so, she's come up with an idea to get hana to unwind, even if it's only for a short time. getting her to leave the garage and head to her apartment was annoying, but once hana has arrived, steph just smiles. ]
Come on, I have something to show you.
so, she's come up with an idea to get hana to unwind, even if it's only for a short time. getting her to leave the garage and head to her apartment was annoying, but once hana has arrived, steph just smiles. ]
Come on, I have something to show you.
[ they're throwing a party at john's hive ("house" fuck you it's a hive if karkat says it is) for. some reason. karkat isn't actually sure what the occasion is. he is pretty sure no one is having a birthday, and at this point it's too late into the party to actually ask, so he just nods his head a lot and loudly proclaims that he is glad for whatever special occasion this is. no one will surely notice he has no clue what's happening.
anyway. like all parties filled with hormonal teenagers, they're onto party games. and luck would have it that dave and karkat are both chosen and unceremoniously shoved into a closet. ]
-- are you fucking kidding me? What kind of idiotic game of this? Why seven of all numbers? Is seven supposed to rile up our lecherous urges?
anyway. like all parties filled with hormonal teenagers, they're onto party games. and luck would have it that dave and karkat are both chosen and unceremoniously shoved into a closet. ]
-- are you fucking kidding me? What kind of idiotic game of this? Why seven of all numbers? Is seven supposed to rile up our lecherous urges?
Dude, seriously? Out of all the low-hanging fruit you could have cracked open here, the time frame's what you're deciding to question.
[no matter how many times he either bats at it or tries to scoot away, the arm of a coat keeps swinging back and gently slapping Dave in the face. also, he has no idea what the actual answer is, if there is one. nor does he know what the party is for. they're good at this.]
Anyway, it's 'cause seven and heaven rhyme, obviously.
[no matter how many times he either bats at it or tries to scoot away, the arm of a coat keeps swinging back and gently slapping Dave in the face. also, he has no idea what the actual answer is, if there is one. nor does he know what the party is for. they're good at this.]
Anyway, it's 'cause seven and heaven rhyme, obviously.
Uh. Eleven is right fucking there. I don't see how seven was chosen over it, it's not a superior number. In fact, eleven would be, considering it's higher.
[ this is the hill that he has decided to die on, apparently. karkat is too stuck on the naming scheme for this dumb as shit party game to be focused on why they were even shoved in here. ]
[ this is the hill that he has decided to die on, apparently. karkat is too stuck on the naming scheme for this dumb as shit party game to be focused on why they were even shoved in here. ]
What? No, you're introducing way too many syllables and probably minutes to the party with eleven. It doesn't flow right.
[two corpses on a hill, then.]
[two corpses on a hill, then.]
What? It's only one extra fucking syllable, Strider. It only adds an extra second to saying it.
[ he gestures aggressively at that, although he just ends up smacking a coat. ]
You know what? Seven's an overrated number. There. I said it. It has too much hype around it when it's just sort of there, simply existing in the numerical sphere.
[ he gestures aggressively at that, although he just ends up smacking a coat. ]
You know what? Seven's an overrated number. There. I said it. It has too much hype around it when it's just sort of there, simply existing in the numerical sphere.
[ getting hana to come ashore from the MEKA base and take an actual literal shore leave was the most insurmountable task of all, but stephanie has been quite a bit more... persuasive as of late.
stephanie's smile upon hana's arrival is met with one of cautious curiosity before she responds, ]
It's not a new hover bike, is it?
stephanie's smile upon hana's arrival is met with one of cautious curiosity before she responds, ]
It's not a new hover bike, is it?
No. I'm poor.
[ it's a joke, but also. no she's poor. she is not sure that she could convince bruce to use some of his funding to give someone else a hover bike unless steph wants to die for it. ]
It's even better! [ ... ] Okay, no it's not, but it's still pretty up there.
[ it's a joke, but also. no she's poor. she is not sure that she could convince bruce to use some of his funding to give someone else a hover bike unless steph wants to die for it. ]
It's even better! [ ... ] Okay, no it's not, but it's still pretty up there.
Yeah, that’s exactly my fucking point. You don’t screw around with that sorta shit when it’s already working fine - it’d be like changing it to “droppin’ it like it’s hot” and expecting everyone to not notice what a stone cold jackass you are.
[did you learn nothing from three years of Dave’s nerdy rapping, Karkat!!]
And since when did you start holding grudges against numbers?
[did you learn nothing from three years of Dave’s nerdy rapping, Karkat!!]
And since when did you start holding grudges against numbers?
[ there's a pause that is very clearly karkat trying to test out the flow of "droppin' it like it's hot" while not wanting to give dave the satisfaction of saying it out loud. ]
Since right now. I would have started this crusade fucking sweeps ago if I had been introduced to this inane game sooner. As soon as we're out of here, I'm making picket signs, Strider.
Since right now. I would have started this crusade fucking sweeps ago if I had been introduced to this inane game sooner. As soon as we're out of here, I'm making picket signs, Strider.
No — I'm not budging until I hear you say it.
[do it, coward! sound it out. count the syllables. marvel at how completely right he is.]
["droppin' it like it's hot." just like that.]
[do it, coward! sound it out. count the syllables. marvel at how completely right he is.]
["droppin' it like it's hot." just like that.]
[ nO!!!! he refuses. he refuses to intensely that he just
smacks one of the coats, so that it swings slightly and hits dave in the face. well, it's more like it lightly touches his face, but it's still a jacket that probably has gross lint on it from being shoved into a closet for god knows how long. ]
Then I hope you are ready to start picking out some furniture and matching new curtains for your new home.
smacks one of the coats, so that it swings slightly and hits dave in the face. well, it's more like it lightly touches his face, but it's still a jacket that probably has gross lint on it from being shoved into a closet for god knows how long. ]
Then I hope you are ready to start picking out some furniture and matching new curtains for your new home.
[WOW. wow?? he immediately bats the coat right back, like they're playing some weird sort of Karkat's-throwing-a-tantrum pong.]
Don't go thinking you're not stuck on the lease with me here, dude. You better —
[Dave suddenly scrunches his face up, very plainly trying to hold in a sneeze.]
[it doesn't work.]
Don't go thinking you're not stuck on the lease with me here, dude. You better —
[Dave suddenly scrunches his face up, very plainly trying to hold in a sneeze.]
[it doesn't work.]
I bett-- [ oh. that's a sneeze. karkat starts gagging. ]
Holy fuck! Your nare excretion just went into my fucking mouth! Didn't Egbert ever teach you any manners?
[ he coughs, as if this is the most disgusting thing to ever happen to him in his life. ]
Holy fuck! Your nare excretion just went into my fucking mouth! Didn't Egbert ever teach you any manners?
[ he coughs, as if this is the most disgusting thing to ever happen to him in his life. ]
[ i have absolutely no clue why they need to fake date
perhaps they are being visited by some alien species that only interacts with people who are dating. for some reason. anyway, she and rui are here at a "welcome to earth" festival for these... aliens.... yes. this is a well thought out starter. ]
Wow! Look at these cakes, they're so cute!
perhaps they are being visited by some alien species that only interacts with people who are dating. for some reason. anyway, she and rui are here at a "welcome to earth" festival for these... aliens.... yes. this is a well thought out starter. ]
Wow! Look at these cakes, they're so cute!
[oh my god.]
[this is probably the most romantic fucking thing that has ever happened to either of them.]
[Dave sniffles mightily, pressing the back of his hand to his mouth. you know, the thing he should have done two seconds ago when he was sneezing.]
The hell makes you think John's got better manners?
[this is probably the most romantic fucking thing that has ever happened to either of them.]
[Dave sniffles mightily, pressing the back of his hand to his mouth. you know, the thing he should have done two seconds ago when he was sneezing.]
The hell makes you think John's got better manners?
[ honestly? the very pinnacle of romance. jane austen WHOMST? ]
He just has that kind of face. That roundish, pink face that just says he knows not to send specks of fluid into someone's unassuming speech hole.
[ karkat pokes at his own tongue, as if he can somehow find the offending snot. ]
He just has that kind of face. That roundish, pink face that just says he knows not to send specks of fluid into someone's unassuming speech hole.
[ karkat pokes at his own tongue, as if he can somehow find the offending snot. ]
Edited 2018-09-02 14:49 (UTC)
[ What if this particular alien species are basically the soulmates meme, and to mitigate the culture shock, they have to act like they're dating? Why it's Rui and not Utsutsu or Sugane or anyone else is another question (they're all busy or something), but Rui is sure Hajime will handle this welcoming with her usual flair. She's always had enough love and acceptance in her heart to embrace the whole world and more.
That's what makes Hajime so fun. Rui smiles. ]
They are. Do you want to try some?
That's what makes Hajime so fun. Rui smiles. ]
They are. Do you want to try some?
[ an entire alien species as the soulmates meme is the absolute best setup for fake dating i've ever heard, thank you.
at the question about trying some, hajime eagerly nods before reaching out to grab a piece. she pauses as a thought hits her, and when she picks up the plate she doesn't immediately go to try it. instead, she holds it out. ]
I'm going to feed you.
at the question about trying some, hajime eagerly nods before reaching out to grab a piece. she pauses as a thought hits her, and when she picks up the plate she doesn't immediately go to try it. instead, she holds it out. ]
I'm going to feed you.
You're overreacting, dude, you were barely even in the line of fire.
[because there's no problem with being slightly in the line of fire, apparently?? disgusting.]
And you're just deflecting from the point I've been making the whole time we've been sitting here. Which is the fact that I'm still completely fucking right.
[because there's no problem with being slightly in the line of fire, apparently?? disgusting.]
And you're just deflecting from the point I've been making the whole time we've been sitting here. Which is the fact that I'm still completely fucking right.
What?
[ what were they talking about before karkat's life ended with spit. he isn't entirely sure anymore, but what he does remember is that dave is definitely not right. over whatever it is. ]
Fuck off, now you're trying to deflect. I have been winning every aspect of this conversation and you cannot handle that.
[ what were they talking about before karkat's life ended with spit. he isn't entirely sure anymore, but what he does remember is that dave is definitely not right. over whatever it is. ]
Fuck off, now you're trying to deflect. I have been winning every aspect of this conversation and you cannot handle that.
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